IM MAKING A PIE AND I ACCIDENTALLY PUT IODINE IN IT INSTEAD OF VANILLA EXTRACT
I ALMOST FED THIS PIE TO MY FAMILY
I WAS GOING TO FEED THIS PIE TO MY CLASSMATES
I WAS ABOUT TO MURDER PEOPLE THROUGH PIE
LIKE LOOK AT THIS FUCKING PIE
DOESNT IT LOOK NICE
DONT YOU WANT TO EAT IT
TOO FUCKING BAD ITS POISONOUS YOU’LL DIE
HOW DO YOU MIX UP IODINE AND VANILLA EXTRACT
WHY DO YOU HAVE IODINE IN THE KITCHEN
WHY DO YOU HAVE IT AT ALL
Lets assume that you used a bottle of 2% free iodine tincture, because A: that’s a commercially available, old-timey disinfectant you might reasonably keep in your kitchen and B: it’s a dark liquid that frequently comes in a brown glass dropper bottle, making it a conceivable way you could confuse iodine with vanilla extract.
That looks like a chocolate cream or mousse pie, so we’ll further assume (taking some liberties with the recipe) that you added a teaspoon and a half of the iodine solution. A teaspoon is about 5 mL, which means that at a rate of around 20 mg of elemental iodine per 1 mL of tincture, that 150 mg of elemental iodine made it into the pie. This obviously could vary based on the actual concentration of iodine used or it it was a Lugol’s solution or something, but we’ll use this as a baseline.
Now this iodine (assuming that it even remains moderately toxic elemental iodine during the preparation and cooking process, which is a dicey prospect at best) would then become interspersed throughout the volume of the pie. A standard 9 inch pie pan holds around four cups (237 mL), giving the pie an elemental iodine dosage of approximately 0.36 mg per mL.
The MSDS for iodine says the LD50 (the dosage at which 50% of the tested subjects, usually lab rats, died within a predetermined time period after receiving the dosage) is 14,000 mg per kg. At the world average weight of 62 kg, that means that a dosage with a reasonably good chance of killing an adult human being is probably around 868g.
As a result, the 10-40 mg or so (depending on how the pie was sliced, how many slices an individual eats, etc) of elemental iodine that one stands to ingest by consumption of this pie comes nowhere close to the almost a kilogram required to kill someone, and probably wouldn’t even give them so much as a stomach ache.
Honestly the biggest danger to those to whom the pie is served is the taste, as they would be faced with the knowledge that they must either endure it or explain to their friend and/or family member that their lovingly crafted pie tastes like an early 20th century field hospital.